Lenny Bruce Quotes

Communism is like one big phone company.

All my humor is based on destruction and despair. If the whole world were tranquil, without disease ...

When you're eight years old nothing is your business.

If Jesus had been killed twenty years ago, Catholic school children would be wearing little electric...

If you live in New York, even if you're Catholic, you're Jewish

The role of a comedian is to make the audience laugh at a minimum of once every fifteen seconds.

There are never enough I Love You's.

(On his addiction to opiods): I'll die young, but it's like kissing God.

The whole motivation for any performer is 'Look at me Ma.'

The 'what should be' never did exist, but people keep trying to live up to it. There is no 'what sho...

The only honest art form is laughter, comedy. You can't fake it...try to fake three laughs in an hou...

The only honest art form is laughter, comedy. You can't fake it... try to fake three laughs in an ho...

In the Halls of Justice the only justice is in the halls.

Miami Beach is where neon goes to die.

I won't say ours was a tough school but we had our own coroner. We used to write essays like "What ...

If you can't say "Fuck" you can't say, "Fuck the government.

There are never enough 'I love you's.

Satire is tragedy plus time. You give it enough time, the public, the reviewers will allow you to sa...

I won't say ours was a tough school, but we had our own coroner. We used to write essays like "What ...

Every day people are straying away from the church and going back to God.